Welp, garden fruits and veggies are starting to ripen! We have zucchini, cucumber, corn, and a few tomatoes coming in. Oh and some green beans! I've never made baby food before since this is my first little one but my mom got me a baby bullet because I plan on trying to make my own anyway. And what better to use than veggies your own family grew? So today I cooked some corn on the cob like a normally would in boiling water, then stuck it in a bowl of ice water til it cooled off for a few minutes, then cut the corn off the cob and put it in a freezer bag. I plan on doing the same for green beans tomorrow. I haven't messed with any recipes yet for baby food but I want to have options!
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7/8/14
Uriah is 25.5 inches long, and 16 pounds. In this picture he is wearing a 12 month onesie, that is still too long, but not too wide. Today he played with his activity mat dangling toys on purpose for the first time, and sat up unassisted for almost a minute. I'm a proud momma! So, it's not very good, but I was looking through sites, trying to find ways to make money, and this stuff just came to me so I wrote it out.
Worth The money I used, To buy you diapers, Would buy me new shoes, But I don’t miss it at all. The tape measure I put, Around my waist, Now measures you head to foot, But I don’t miss it at all. The space we had free, Is now filled with gear, So the carpet I can’t see, But I don’t miss it at all. The time I spent, On what I wanted to do, All to you it went, But I don’t miss it at all. The man I married, I don’t see as much, But by daddy you get carried, And I don’t miss it at all. The sleep I would get, Before your cuddles and love, Helped me focus, not forget, But I don’t miss it at all. The emptiness I couldn’t place, Except knowing it was there, Until I saw your face, I don’t miss it at all. I just keep telling myself... there are people out there with worse in-laws than you. Not fair that others have better ones but still. My husband is caught between the tension my in-laws have created by being rude to me, and me not wanting to deal with it anymore. It basically started when I didn't want people visiting me while in labor, and hubby's parents (well, his dad and stepmom are who I'm referring to here) showed up unannounced in my room. Well, I was in no mood to entertain... contracting and everything. Not to mention hubby's dad kept trying to pull him out of the room to talk when hubby and I were discussing ditching our birth plan and just going for a medicated birth. It was kind of more important than anything his dad had to say (his dad had brought food for hubby so he was annoyed that hubby blew him off to talk to me about things). Well then we had to move in next door to my in-laws because of a really long story, and well now they know when we leave and when we're home. It's just not good. The night we came home from the hospital, we were exhausted, had so much to set up and unpack and do, and hubby's dad texted and said they got us all pizza and were coming over. Hubby told them no, we didn't want visitors tonight, and they could come by tomorrow. Father in law was not happy. Then Step mother in law kept asking to babysit Uriah. Um, I'm a stay at home mom. What do I need a babysitter for? Someone to come help me cook, clean, or play with the little guy while I at least do those things sure. But I'm not leaving my less than a month old child with someone else for an extended period of time. Increase tension. Well, hubby and I decided that anyone who wanted to visit could, just call or text first. This is for various reasons. Number one, I walk around the house in various states of undress cause well, it's my house and I want to be comfy. And number two, I don't want visitors if my house is really out of order or we're exhausted or about to leave the house for something. And number three, it is for everyone's benefit, since there are certain times little man is asleep or awake. So I can be like, "Uriah's asleep right now, but he'll be up after 1:30 if you want to come over then." Well, hubby's family is the type that just walks into each others houses without any warning. I'm so not used to that. So far most of his family has been good about calling or texting before just popping over, but his parents don't like this rule. So instead they insist we take him to them. Next door. Because walking over here is too much for them I guess? Anyway, they bug hubby all the time saying "Why haven't you brought him over? We miss him!" Um, just send us a text and come on over? Then there was just the blatantly rude things, like when little guy was 5 weeks old, got a fever around 5pm, and then had blood in his diaper at 11. We took him to the emergency room. The next day, we did a follow up with his pediatrician who had us admitted to the hospital. While there, we called our family and let them know what was up in case they wanted to drop by the hospital to visit. Well his dad reamed him about not calling to let him know as soon as Uriah felt sick. "We raised 8 kids we know a thing or two." Um, excuse me for taking my son to a doctor and not his grandparents when he's running a fever? And I overheard "I know your wife doesn't think we know anything..." And this was right after they'd done a catheter test on my son, his penis bleeding, and I was so fragile and crying I yelled "Shut up!" in the direction of my hubby with the phone but I doubt father in law heard me. Then, hubby wanted everyone to wash their hands before touching Uriah, and neither of us enjoy when others kiss his face. Kind of unsanitary really. Well, his step mom loves kissing the baby on his face and refuses to wash her hands before touching him (I seriously think they hear what we say and their brain says "Ok, I'll do the opposite"). And well one day she kissed his face and everyone laughed cause he looked shocked. I was ticked of constantly dealing with them so I said it was probably because we don't touch or kiss his face much. "Why?" asked hubby's sisters. "Because of germs" I said, looking at step mother in law. She rolled her eyes at me and sat down with the baby anyway while the sister said they have to get germ sometime. And I said "Yes but I'd prefer not to have a sick newborn." Then, his parents who make more money than any of our other family members, asked us what to buy Uriah. I said a pack n play or walker. Well, they wanted to buy something else. I said we don't need anything else except maybe cloth diapers. His step mother asked if we were using disposable. Hubby said maybe just in the hospital, and she bought us a 100+ pack of disposables. Needless to say we returned it and never used them. Then weeks later they bought us a used pack n play, with lots of stains and scuffs. I flipped out but they weren't there when hubby brought it over, because it wasn't a gift it was the gift of a chores. I had to spend hours cleaning it until the water I soaked it in went from yellow to clear. You can get a basic new one for $40 but no. Well then one night the nail landed in the coffin for me. This whole time I'd been smiling and trying to get along, playing with what they wanted. But one night on the phone with father in law, I was concerned I'd gotten bit by a brown recluse. I was discussing it with him and out of nowhere he says "This family is trying hard to love you" and insinuated hubby's sisters and father in law and his wife were having a hard time getting along with me now. I'm sorry, but I think I am very easy to love. I have never once prevented anyone from seeing Uriah, even when they showed up unannounced (which when we got back from the hospital when Uriah got sick at age 5 weeks, father in law & step mother in law busted in without knocking- we'd just gotten home so we hadn't had a chance to lock the door- and ran in and grabbed the baby, never having visited us in the hospital even though they don't work anymore). I've never been rude to them or declined any reasonable offer to come over or hang out at their home. I even thanked them for the gifts (the pack n play and some used clothes covered in stains) even though I didn't want them. Well I'm done. If I'm so hard to love, let it be so. I've been nothing but nice to them, now they can just have civil. Hubby is just pulling his hair out because they bother him to death and he has to go to their house to pick up our mail a lot of times when it goes to their house, and then he comes home and asks if I'll play by their rules just to alleviate the pressure on him and often times I have given in but not anymore. I feel bad for hubby because father in law & his wife treat him like a child still and have no respect for either of us as parents. I mean, hubby spends every week all week busy doing crap and then has to have this weight put on him by them and it's not fair. So now there's major tension whenever I'm in a room with them. Yeah I feel bad for hubby but it's their fault. I can't be nice to someone's face and then dislike them b Hope anyone reading this is having a good day already! Uriah has been sleeping through the night 3 nights before last, but then last night daddy wasn't home to help me so he got antsy of course. He was stirring every. hour. Wanting something. Finally at 4 I just picked him up and slept with him in bed. He STILL kept stirring, but at least he was content enough that I could sleep better even if it was off and on. Finally at 6 he wasn't having it anymore so we got up and he got a bottle. I don't think he would have slept nearly that long though if I hadn't co-slept with him, which is disappointing since the other nights were all in his crib. Oh well. I think today is a good day to start a 4 hour schedule possibly, or 3 and a half and see how he does. He might also be having a growth spurt and that's what all the whining was about. He did jump from 5oz bottles to 6.
We're going to my mom's today, and she lives 1hr45m away. Fun fun. Have you seen how much room cloth diapers take up? Gee whiz. I just packed the clean ones in a big wet bag because there was no way to fit 11 diapers, 3 bottles & formula, & clothes & stuff into a diaper bag, no matter how big. I'd have to take a suitcase. It'd be different if little man didn't pee 4 times in the hour after he eats. I'm getting bored of his 6-9 month outfits too. I mean, he has plenty. We never run out, but they are the same 7 outfits or so. He got to wear every newborn outfit but one twice before they all had to be put away. Then he got good use out of his 0-3 and 3-6 month clothes to where he wore them multiple times but not enough that I got bored. But he's been in 6-9 already so long that I want to go shopping for more. Maybe we can all go to Goodwill today. That's where almost all his clothes are from anyway. l told people if they were going to buy us clothes to buy us 12 month since he was growing so quick, so we have plenty of those, but he doesn't fit them yet (thank goodness... he's big enough!). Also, we don't have a scale but my mom does, so we get to find out what little man weighs today at 2 and a half months! I haven't weighed him since 2 months. Fun fact... 11 weeks post partum and on my 3rd monthly cycle. I wish I could be pregnant all the time but I don't want that many babies! I had no morning sickness and I didn't have heart burn until the 3rd trimester, and I also didn't get any pains besides ligament pains until the 3rd trimester when I got SPD. So the first two trimesters were excellent. I couldn't have had a better pregnancy all around. No acne, no periods, no cramps, everyone pays all this attention to you. Then when you're not pregnant anymore, you get left with a sagging stomach, stretch marks from hell, bleeding constantly, revenge of the acne, and a screaming baby who lets you get 2 hours of sleep a night. Oh, and my psoriasis all but disappeared when I was pregnant. I had to use a topical steroid once a month to keep it at bay. Now, I had to buzz my hair and start tanning 4 times a week to try and help it because I was going through the topical steroid solution every 2 weeks. The whole bottle. And when you have psoriasis, you have 3 options. Light therapy (which is expensive and no different from a tanning bed), topical solutions (Talconex, Clobetasol, shampoos, etc), or immune suppressing shots (which they are only allowed to give for 10 years b/c they don't know the long term effects of suppressing someone's immune system that long). There are pills, but I don't even count those because they can cause serious liver damage and/or prevent you from having children during the use of them, and for a couple years afterwards. I mean, that's just kind of insane. So now I have a wig, but everyone will know it's a wig. I wanted a long hair one because my hair is going to be short for a long time and I wanted to have a different option (the psoriasis is on my scalp), and before I buzzed my hair it was already short. So all my family is going to see me suddenly have long hair for no reason. Oh well. It's really no ones business but mine but still. It's embarrassing in a way and really hard for me. So yeah I wish I was pregnant all the time, but without all that comes after. I wish there was a Hobby Lobby near where my mom lives... there's one 30 mins away but I don't feel like driving to it just for that when we're already driving so far to her home. I need picture frames for the 2 month pics we took of Uriah, and when HL has a frame sale, they're the cheapest you can find. I found his shadow box there for $12. Wood and real glass, not cheap thin metal and Plexiglas. Well, this has turned out very random, but oh well. I don't exactly have many friends to talk to. Since we moved to Illinois (sad face) all my friends are in Missouri. I thought I'd have some here in Illinois, but they are all the types that you have to call, they won't ever call you. And a lot of times even if you call, they won't call back if you miss them. Hubby said people in Missouri are so kept to themselves, well, yeah, but at least we don't pretend to be your friend in the process like here. I miss people who were 100% upfront and real. Most of what I have encountered in this area of Illinois are people who are real but keep to themselves like Missouri people, or they are nice to your face but could really care less about you. Maybe it's the baby thing. Maybe people are afraid if they hang out with me now it'll all be about the baby or that'll be all I can talk about. Which isn't fair. I have a lot of things I'd like to talk about with a friend, but my only friend is hubby. And when we're fighting, I'm totally alone. I guess that can be a stay at home mom's lot in life until maybe when the little guy gets older and we can go to places like the park and hang out with others like us. Then though I'd be worried about if those kids had vaccinations Uriah didn't (we're delaying some years down the line). I mean, those vaccinated for whooping cough hold the bacteria in their throats for up to 6 weeks after the shot, and he's not getting that one until sports time (because of the tetanus element of the shot). Blah. I feel like I'm being too negative so I'm going to stop. Because I'm actually normally a very positive person, and happy. I think that's why Uriah is so social. He's been laughing and smiling since week 6. Now that he's 11 weeks, he does it all the time and I know how to get him to do it even when he feels bad. He might not be able to roll over or sit up unassisted or play with toys yet, but he is very socially advanced I think. He also doesn't just 'cry' anymore if you know what I mean. He makes noises. Like they have different tones and sounds. Like he might be crying out "Mana da maha" or something. It's not just "Waaah" like it used to be. I feel like he's trying to tell me what's wrong and communicate, even if I don't always get it right. Welp, it's feeding time so I'm signing off! Happy 4th! So I just read the Hunger Games series this week. I got it almost a year ago but when I went to college between 08 & 12, it completely burned me out on books. I was constantly reading and none of it for fun. I hadn't read for pleasure since, which is kind of sad since I've always loved it. I read my first book at 5, & never stopped. Til college killed it. But I'm happy to have picked it back up again. They were very edge of your seat books, & I liked them. But they are definitely preteen/teen geared in writing & I'm not a fan of how the author would write pages of Katniss's emotions and thoughts, but then have a major event happen in one sentence. The great amount of insight into the main character made her incredibly relatable, but the stark contrast of that to quick under described plot points stood out to me. The last book is making me look forward to the movie more. There are some things the movies have done better than the books, though they've of course left out a few things I think are important (felt the same when the Harry Potter movies came out) but overall I like them as much if not more than the books. It's just so hard not to talk about spoilers with hubby now that I know the end!
Basically, being a mom comes down to a simple thing... is your child loved & cared for. No one will do everything right. I've done so many things wrong in the 2 and a half short months Uriah has been on this earth, but I know he has never not been loved or cared for to the best of my ability. We also make choices that others would think is irresponsible, but doesn't really hurt anyone. Like I didn't breastfeed. Not because I couldn't. Heck, I'm almost 11 weeks post partum and still leaking. But I used formula from the beginning because I just didn't want to breastfeed. He's still getting all his nutrition and getting fed (I mean he's huge really, even if not chubby) so why are we judging each other? I cloth diaper, but I don't look down on those who use disposable. Hey they are a lot easier. No doubt. I definitely see the appeal. So next time some mom tells you something and the first thing that pops in your mind is "That's not what I would do" stop and think... does it really affect how the child is loved and cared for so much that it deserves harsh judgment? If not, withhold it. Even if it does, withhold it to think about putting yourself in their shoes first. We've all done things we never thought we'd do because every baby is different, and every mom is different, and every situation is different. But we can all be good mommies with happy, healthy babies.
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