With my little one, I knew we couldn't start a schedule before a month old. I mean, he was just too little. Well, then at 5 weeks we had the horrible uti scare, where we went to the ER and they said nothing was wrong with him despite a high fever and blood in his diaper. And then we went to our ped. who admitted us immediately and they found he had gotten a kidney infection. And then he recovered thanks to antibiotics but during week 6 we had to go to St. Louis Children's and get a VCUG where they discovered he had kidney reflux (or VUR) grade 4 on the right and grade 2 on the left. So with all that mess scheduling was still out the window for my poor baby, especially when we were trying to find the right antibiotic since the sulfa first gave him severe diarrhea, and then made his stomach hurt so bad he would just cry and cry.
But by 8 weeks, we were good and I noticed patterns with his habits of eating and sleeping. It was easy to get him on a 3 hour schedule that looked like so:
7am- wake for the day, eat
His naps were never easy or very predictable simply because he's never been one to like napping. Even at 8 weeks he was only getting 15 hours of sleep on average (now it's 11.5 at 4-5 months). He is just very hyper for such a small thing. But we were doing good and I was happy. He even slept through the night without a feeding from 9.5 weeks to 11.5 weeks. It was lovely.
Then came 12 weeks old. Sleep regression, teething, growth spurt mania. Everything went out the window. Some days he was hungry every 4 hours, some days every 2.5 hours. I had no idea. And he was up all night long. Some nights every 30 minutes, most nights every hour. That lasted for 5 weeks. Now, he'll be 5 months old in about 10 days and some of the madness induced at week 12 has gone away. Things still are unpredictable. Little thing is still growing like a weed so even keeping a feeding schedule is impossible. But there are a few good nights here or there. And a good night is when he goes without a feeding from 9pm to 4am (sleeps from 10-2) so I get 3.5 hours straight of sleep. At 2am he comes to bed with me to soothe him back to sleep. Then when he wakes at 4 to eat I feed him and wait until he's back asleep to put him in his crib, because if I go back to bed with him, he'll wake up crying at 6. Either way he starts to wake at 6 (just if he's in his crib it doesn't involve crying) and I'll take him back to bed with me, and then he wakes for the day at 8. So, I get about 7.5 hours of very interrupted sleep, but it's better than it was. Then you have nights like last night, where I had him asleep by 10 and went to bed at 10:30. But he was up at 1. Then wanted to eat at 3am. Then woke up 30 minutes after me laying him in his crib after that feeding. Then him kicking me awake at 5, and 6, and 7, until I give up and get up because he's hungry again by now. So now it's 8:20 in the morning. He ate at 7 and fell asleep at 8. I can't go back to sleep once it's daylight (my brain is stupid like that). So now I have no idea what feeding and napping will look like today.
I do know my husband worked from 11pm-3am last night, but didn't slide into bed until 6am, and now he'll say he's too tired to help me when he could have been in bed before 5 easily.
Is it just my husband that says he understands and feels bad for me that I never get sleep but then doesn't help at all? When I ask, he says I need to take the baby to his parents during the day and take a nap. Um, that's ok. I'll just wait it out until baby starts sleeping through the night I guess. And it can't come soon enough.